Emotional intelligence. Those who lack it see it as an oxymoron. Maybe a lot of men haven’t been taught how to practice emotional intelligence. But caring for others should make you curious to learn. If how another person feels, perceives your actions, expresses themselves, etc. Never crosses your mind, you don’t care about them. It’s not up to a grown woman to teach you, a grown man, how to be a considerate human being. Unless she’s a mother figure to you. And a mother figure is just that. Don’t impose that role on a friend or significant other. Do your own work yourself and come back when you are able and willing to meet someone halfway. Otherwise, care enough to let it go. But I guess being perceptive enough to assess yourself and take those steps requires a degree of emotional intelligence. It’s emotionally and sometimes physically draining to do the thinking for two people. It’s an undue burden but so many men expect it.